CAT-TASTROPHE
A woman noted that the number of stray cats in her area went up in recent days and seemed glad about it until she saw a certain cat.
Noting that the cat was a female, she said, “Ai, kinahanglan diay nato ipanglabay ning uban oi kay mga baye (Oh, we need to dispose of the other cats because they are female).”
Appalled, a passerby questioned the lady why she had to throw out the cats when they did nothing harmful to her.
FACE PAINT
Fresh from the Sinulog party, a girl said that she was glad no one attempted to smear her face with paint while walking around Baseline area.
Her gay friend noted, “Ay, mga gwapa ra man gud ang ilang butangan ug pintal (Ay, they only smear face paint on beautiful girls).”
Irked, the girl responded by dumping water on her friend’s face and the others close by could only snicker at the ensuing quarrel.
DIET GOAL
Determined to stick to her New Year’s resolution, a woman said she will stick to her diet by ditching rice in every meal.
Her friend was skeptical and said she had been saying the same thing since last year. Indignant, the woman said at least she had a goal rather than be hurt by waiting on her ex.
The friend replied sarcastically: “On the bright side, kung wa sad kaayo ka nagpakatanga, di sad guro ka makahuna-huna ana na (if you weren’t so stupid, you would never have thought about that) goal.”