Confronting darkness

BAGUIA

A good friend from the university, one who used to study here, died last night, having taken his own life.

The irony in the death of this young man, popularly known as J.I., is that he had built a name for himself as an advocate of mental health care.

I do not think it is time to be timid and hush up his suicide.

The father of J.I. himself has gone public with the manner of his son’s passing.

The issue of poor mental health with its accompanying pressures to self-harm and self-killing among patients should be confronted. This confrontation has at least two fronts beyond the socio-political where laws are being crafted to institutionalize mental health care.

First is real, flesh-and-blood communication that has become a rarity as whole societies drown, many times without second thought, in a deluge of gadgets and mass media that when used without moderation alienate rather than connect people.

Communicating via hieroglyph-like emoticons or swiftly changing sets of memes and acronyms is no sin, but these codes ought not to replace face-to-face, near-distance communication that is to relationships what oxygen is to our lungs.

Second is insight. Exupery through the fox to his little prince told the world that the heart alone sees rightly, that eyes are blind to the essential.

The last words and pictures posted by J.I. show no sign that he was deeply depressed.

If mental and emotional states can be so easily concealed not only online but offline, then we cannot but raise the quality of our kindness and compassion.

“The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world.

There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor,” Buscaglia wrote.

“But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents.

Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give.

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around.

It’s overwhelming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt.”

Finally, if you are down and blue, do not hesitate to reach out to another.

People can be far more understanding and willing to help than we assume, if only we communicate.

May you rest in the bosom of God’s mercy, J.I.

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