Closure and forgiveness. (CDN PHOTO/JUNJIE MENDOZA)
All’s well that ends well.
Fr. Romeo Obach made his way the other night to the home of the 17-year-old single mother he had insulted.
The family was watching TV when they heard someone knocking on the door past 7 p.m.
“I opened the door and was surprised to see Fr. Obach,” she said.
He immediately reached out and embraced her, sobbing and asking for forgiveness for the hurtful words he had used in condemning the unwed teenager at her son’s baptism three days earlier in the Sacred Heart Chaplaincy which he oversees in barangay Jagobiao, Mandaue City.
She had to calm him down because the priest was crying hard.
After almost an hour of quiet conversation with her in the living room, where two other priests and her mother sat with them, Fr. Obach took three small medallions from his pocket.
“These are for you and your son. These will guide and bless you everyday,” said the priest.
The third medallion went to the girl’s 37-year-old mother, whose uploading of a video of Fr. Obach’s tirade at the baptism earlier set off a wave of rage from Internet viewers.
On the face of each pin is the image of Mary, the mother of Jesus, venerated as Our Mother of Perpetual Help with special devotion by the Redemptorist congregation.
Before the talk ended, one priest led them all in a prayer.
“The priest thanked God that there was forgiveness, and that we did not file a case against Fr. Obach,” she told CDN. “He also prayed for us to have more blessings and happiness.”
The teenager, who plans to go back to school next semester, said she wanted to move on.
First, she had to ask what everyone familiar with the now-viral video wondered: Why did you do it?
Fr. Obach told her he too was shocked by the harsh words that came out of his mouth.
“Wala siya magdahum na masulti to niya. Sa wala pa ang bunyag nanginit na daw iyang ulo,” she recalled him saying. ( He didn’t expect to speak like that. Even before the baptism, his head was feeling hot.)
“Usually mag-pray siya before sa baptism but ato nga time ingon siya wala siya ka-pray. Ako siya gipasaylo. Ako siya giingnan na OK ra to father. Nagpasalamat ko nga gibisita ko niya aron ma close na ang issue,” the teenage mom said.
(He said he would usually pray before baptizing a child but at that time he was not able to pray. I told him I already forgave him and told him it’s OK, Father. I thanked him for visiting me so that there would be closure on this issue)
From other sources it was learned that the priest had arrived at the chapel after a full day that had started early in the morning, and was told on the spot that he had to baptize a child.
Unfamiliar with the 17-year-old mother with a baby in her arms, he asked her where her husband was. She said “wala” (none). He asked the same question thrice until he realized she wasn’t married. Then he started an impromptu sermon about the sin of living together without the benefit of marriage.
(In many parishes, parents and godparents undergo a pre-baptism briefing called a “pre-Jordan” orientation to prepare them for their roles as spiritual guardians of the infant to be baptized.)
NO GRUDGE
The teenage mother told reporters later she held no grudge.
She said she saw the sadness in the priest’s face and that he kept his head bowed when she spoke.
Fr. Obach told her he hasn’t been able to sleep well after Sunday’s outburst.
The teenager said she was sorry the incident blew up after her mother uploaded the video of his sermon and felt sorry for the priest who was the target of many online bashers.
“Human na (It’s over),” she said.
Yesterday, she deleted the video posted on her mother’s Facebok account.
They had agreed beforehand that if Fr. Obach showed up and asked forgiveness, she would take down the video.
The video was shared at least 20,000 times since it was uploaded on Sunday evening. Copies remain in various Internet sites, including a YouTube channel, a permanent record of a priest’s impulsive and hurtful action.
Earlier Fr. Obach made a public apology for using “cruel means” to explain teachings of the the Catholic church about marriage, then sent a handwritten letter to the teenage mother. The Redemptorist community also issued a statement calling his conduct “unacceptable”.
RESOLVED
Fr. Alfonso Suico Jr., media liason officer of the Redemptorist Community in Cebu, said they are very thankful that that both sides have found a peaceful resolution.
“This has been very providential. We never expected things to turn out this way. We’re hopeful that the persons involved in this issue will find healing and be able to move on. What Fr. Obach did (by going to the girl’s home) was a very sincere move. It was a humbling experience to go there personally. It only proves his desire for reconciliation. That to me is very grace-filled,” Suico said.
The Redemptorists’ own internal investigation of Fr. Obach’s conduct will still continue.
“Sanctions will depend on what the Canon Law provides. For now, Fr. Obach still could not celebrate the sacraments in public pending the results of the investigation,” Suico said.
The teenage mom said the traumatic episode didn’t diminish her faith as a Catholic.
She said she would go the chaplaincy, which is near their house, to hear Mass on Sunday.
In fact, if her son decides to become a priest one day, she said she wouldn’t mind.
During her pregnancy, the mother said she would read aloud Bible passages to the child in her belly. She said she could feel the baby move whenever she would read.
“I told him before that if he decides to become a priest I wouldn’t mind, and then he moved again,” the young mom recalled with a smile.
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