Rock steady

I didn’t have my car so I had to wait for a tricycle  to take me home. The wait was long. I found myself pacing up and down the road until I came across jagged rocks.
I was so bored, tired and hungry that I entertained myself by kicking the rocks around. They were not small so I had to push a little forcefully with my foot so I could move them.
Every time I did so, the rocks would roll once or twice but eventually, they would  stop and stay stationary on the ground. I tried to kick them from another side, but the rocks’ center of gravity inexorably caused them to come to  rest on the same side.
How were these rocks, with sides of different cuts, able to find their center of gravity and stay stationary on the ground no matter how many times they rolled?
Even when battered by wind and water, these rocks would continue to roll, stop, roll, stop, never mind where they get carried to.  And when you look at them, they appear strong and firm.
Who has not been battered by the storms of life?
Who has not been shattered emotionally and physically?
Who has not felt pushed around, bullied, and kicked over that self-esteem is lost?
Who has not been scared, angry, embarrassed, vengeful, jealous or depressed?
Just like the rocks with jagged sides of different textures, we can have conflicting emotions within us and with other people.
But unlike the rocks, we are not able to swiftly roll over  and stay firmly on the ground. We wobble, lose our senses and sadly, just give up on life.
And through the rough times, we hear people telling us — “It’ll be okay; it’s for the best.” “Time heals all wounds.” “Keep your chin up–just keep moving forward.” “Forgive and forget.”
Nothing wrong. People mean well when they say these words. But really, will it be okay? What good could possibly come from going through a difficult time? Can our wounds really heal well? How long does it take for one to  move forward?
When my husband died young due to a sickness that usually afflicts old people, I found it hard to stand steady. I had already gone through a rough childhood, and his death was like a dagger that again opened old, barely healed wounds inside me.
For the next three months, I was stumped on what to do next in life. It’s like everything and anything is so hard to face. For the next three years, I was going through my life mechanically.
1999 brought in the winds of change. I recognized that I was not alone. God is with me and for me. I connected myself with people who could lift me up, not bring me down. They are able to do it because they too believe that God is with them and for them.
I started volunteering my time. I went on missions – to the less fortunate. I found out it was  great therapy. I got out of myself and realized some people’s situations were worse than mine and also found others who were more fortunate than me.
I exerted effort to find beauty around me….the footprints of God in His creation. I walked and literally smelled the flowers.
These are just the few things I did as I roll through life’s challenges.
Moving on from life’s challenges is hard. These are lessons that may be hard to bear, but if we involve God in everything, we will find the strength to carry on. “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength…” (Philippians 4:13).
We may not understand why God allows trials to enter our lives, we still thank God that through them, we can gain the greatest wisdom to find Him.
Here’s a prayer that I find comforting: “Lord, I know I don’t need to fear the storms of life around me. Help me to be calm because I stand secure in You. The storms of life prove the strength of our anchor.”
Like the rocks I was kicking around on the road, we can roll with life’s problems. Just roll on even if it brings hurt and misdirection. But hold on to the thought that there is something better for you out there, that there is hope waiting, that the rolling will eventually stop and you will find yourself standing steady. Rock steady.

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