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Creepy doll, awful film

Annabelle: creation

FOR a horror movie to work, it needs three things:

a horror movie to work, it needs three things:

1. Suspense 2. A great story, and 3. An exceptional cast.

Unfortunately “Annabelle: Creation” has none of these … and is doomed for time and all eternity to go down as one of the gaw awful horror movies in the history of cinema.

It is stupid to the extreme and filled with “political correctness” teenage actresses who go and do the dumbest things in the world.

Actually I’d want to be in a house full of them during the forthcoming zombie apocalypse so I can shove them out the door—one at a time—and feed the undead like I do the neighbor’s cats each morning. Okay, that was a tad harsh.

But let’s understand that “Anabelle: Creation” is a prequel to first “Annabelle” movie that came out in 2014 in which “a couple begins to experience terrifying supernatural occurrences involving a vintage doll shortly after their home is invaded by satanic cultists.”

Really spiritually uplifting, huh?

Annabelle is also part of the “Conjuring” series of films (number 3 is currently in production) in which the last outing had the adversary of everything good and righteous be manifest in a maniacal and possessed nun.

This time, in the Annabelle spinoff, we rewind back more than a decade when a husband/wife couple have lost their young daughter in a freak car accident.

The official synopsis then says, “Twelve years after the tragic death of their little girl, a dollmaker and his wife welcome a nun and several girls from a shuttered orphanage into their home, soon becoming the target of the dollmaker’s possessed creation, Annabelle”.

And there you have it—just like the first movie. Instead we have teenage girls being terrified by a porcelain doll that just shows up in all the wrong places.

Actually the doll is placed there by the film’s production crew and the camera just pans that way to make it look like the doll just popped up.

After watching “Annabelle: Creation,” I felt about this doll the same way I did when I saw a full grown rat in my home at 11 a.m. the other morning.

Suddenly the rat just appeared in my living room, saw me coming toward it and started to run … just before I whack it over the head with my son’s yellow dump truck.

That is what I wanted lead actresses Lulu Wilson (Linda) and Talitha Bateman (Janice) to do: Just take a broom and whack “Annabelle” over the head and then take it by the legs and pound it against the wall into a zillion pieces.

Apparently, the “evil” forces behind “Annabelle” take possession of two of the orphan girls and the havoc begins which at the film’s close, eventually ties this film in with the original.

As a Christian believer, I also found “Annabelle: Creation” personally offensive.

It is anti-God and certainly anyone of the Catholic persuasion will find what is done to the young nun in this film to be morally reprehensible.

The undead are everywhere and after one of the girls—if you knew what she is doing outside, in her nightgown and holding Annabelle would turn this horror immediately into a comedy—as she drops the doll into a well, hears a creepy sound, turns, and goes over to look back into the darkness when two “evil” hands grab her by the arms and yank her inside.

Dear Reader, you just know what is going to happen to each and every one of these teenage girls who stand there, crying in the face of the adversary and wait to be carved into bite sized “happy meals.”

Filmed on the Warner Bros. studio lot in Los Angeles, “Annabelle: Creation” is directed David F. Sandberg (“Light’s Out”) and written by Gary Dauberman who penned the first “Annabelle” film.

I love PR people who shoved out this nonsense: “ ’Annabelle: Creation’ premiered at the LA Film Festival on June 19, 2017, and was theatrically released in the United States on August 11, 2017. The film has grossed $80 million worldwide and received generally positive reviews from critics, who praised the atmosphere and acting, and noted it as an improvement over its predecessor.”

Ya think so?

And in case you were wondering Sandberg and Dauberman are next teaming up for … are you ready …

“The Nun” which comes out next year.

I suppose we must be in the “Latter Days” when filth like “Annabelle: Creation” makes its way onto the silver screen.

There are many sharks and evils in this world but you don’t have to pay money to see them. Stand up to adversity, protect yourself and your children and stay far away from the truly awful rubbish. You have been warned.

Questions, comments or travel suggestions, write me at [email protected]

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