Old but Gold: The Lost Art of Courtship

By Joanne Fengee R. Benedicto February 09,2018

[Photo | May Anne Magallanes]

Gone are the days when people had to spend long hours of picking the right stationery and practicing neat handwriting. Today, everything is possible with a push of a button. And with all these new forms of technological advances that have been introduced to us, it wouldn’t hurt to take a trip to a time when old romantic practices were at its peak.

Let’s start with one of the most traditional forms of communication, writing letters. Letters are one of the most basic yet powerful ways of connecting with people. Being able to share your love towards a special someone with words from your own heart will never go wrong. It doesn’t have to be fancy or over the top, it just has to be real. If you want to take your word game up a notch, you could even write poems.

Why not express your feelings through a song? This is something we often see in movies. The suitor in his best clothes accompanied by his best guy friends serenading the maiden perched on the balcony of her home, while the rest of her family watches over the whole scene. There might not be a balcony, and it doesn’t necessarily have to be a guy who does the serenading, it still paints quite a lovely picture either way. Who doesn’t love a good song?

Meeting the parents and loved ones is something that should be prioritized. Oftentimes, this is not done by couples in fear of not gaining the approval of the family. However, it is very important to not only connect with the person you are courting but to also make an effort to get to know and bond with the people around him/her as well. It shows how you not only give importance to that one person, but you also value the people who are special to him/her. Make an effort to make each other feel that you want to become a bigger part of each other’s lives.

Take your time in getting to know each other. This is one of the most challenging yet exciting parts of courtship. Sometimes people are too eager to rush into a relationship that they miss a lot of the important details to consider before deciding to be with someone. It takes a lot of effort and patience, but taking things slowly will allow you to establish a better understanding of each other. Fall deeper in love with the person and not only with the idea of having someone to be with.

Minimize the use of social media when you’re together. Instead of spending a significant amount of your time finding the right filter for your cute selfie together to post on Instagram or scrolling away on Facebook, why not try to put down your phones and simply unplug from the internet for a while. Talk more about what’s going on in each other’s lives and less about your mutual friend’s mysterious status update.

The modern times might have gifted us with ways for easier and faster communication, but we cannot deny that traditional methods still have a powerful effect. It might seem a bit outdated to some people, and call me old-fashioned, but just like what Phil Coulson said in Marvel’s The Avengers, sometimes “people might just need a little old-fashioned.”

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