Vignettes
Mom, can I…?” Bell carefully explained to her mom what she wanted.
Her mother listened attentively. She raised an eyebrow, smiled at Bell and gave her reply.
“I don’t think it’s the best thing for now, dear.”
“But…!!!” Bell’s tone suddenly changed.
“Dear, try to understand. A ‘no’ may be always hard to accept. But accepting it now will forge our ‘yes’ for things that are more important in life later.”
“Whatever!!!” Bell stormed out of her mother’s room.
Bell’s temper had reached its threshold. She couldn’t think of anything to de-stress herself. In no time she found herself restlessly sitting before their desktop computer in the living room.
She began Googling for something on the browser.
“Wuzzup, Bell?” Jill, her older cousin suddenly peeked behind her.
Bell only pouted, shrugged her shoulders and continued her silent search.
She couldn’t care less that Jill would see what she was typing in the SEARCH bar.
“HOW TO CHANGE FAMILY…?” a surprised Jill read aloud Bell’s query.
“Why are you searching for that?” she asked.
“I’m sick of this family,” Bell replied.
“Why?”
“Because mom wouldn’t give me what I asked,” she eyeball-rolled back to Jill.
“Did you know that wanting to change your family is going against the Fourth Commandment, ‘coz it’s like saying you don’t love your mom and dad?”
“Reeeally???” Bell froze at Jill’s words.
“Well, maybe you’re just angry and don’t really mean changing your parents.”
When Jill left the room, Bell quickly deleted her query.
She then began slowly typing down a new phrase:
[How to say SORRY to your parents.]
* * *
Bell’s amusing Googling may only seem like an innocent child’s whimsical outlet. Today, however, more and more people are constantly turning to search portals looking for some of the most common questions that seldom find answers in the home, school or among friends.
Pope Benedict XVI had this in mind when he described how the youth of today are constantly searching for happiness. They are trying to find answers to their deepest desires and insecurities. Benedict XVI, however, laments that they don’t look for it in the right places.
Instead of finding answers to family problems, inner insecurities and tendencies, discouragement and rejection, etc., within their own homes, the young turn to the Internet for solutions.
This may gradually form a disordered individualistic desire that often leads their still immature and imperceptive minds shipwrecked in the harmful confusing psychological shoals and crag-filled ideas of cyberspace.
Instead of seeking answers outside the home and oneself, the youth ought to try to interiorly Google themselves to discover and practice the most common answers that could solve many of their personal and family issues. Here are some examples of interior googling tools: Prayer.
Many of the problems and issues encountered by today’s youth can actually be resolved without even turning to either Google or Wikipedia. For example, they can try venturing into the spiritual portal of personal prayer to bring up their problems to God. By experience, I have met many young people who sadly express that they do not know how to personally share with God their personal life, ideals, and trials.
Sacraments and direction. They can also have constant recourse to the portals of the Sacrament of Reconciliation and the accompanying aid of spiritual direction from a wise and encouraging director.
These are not difficult to access nor too complicated to engage oneself in. Here they will receive practically tailored answers to their unique conditions in life and society.
Moreover, the guidance they receive is packaged with the powerful light of grace that helps them to mature humanly and spiritually.
Personal self-examination. Before we even react to what may seem to us as contradictions, let us examine ourselves first to see the “beam in our own eyes.” We will often realize that a great deal of the solution begins by being open to first changing some attitude in ourselves. This is effectively achieved, with God’s help, in sincerely examining one’s conscience.
It is here that one places himself before God more than the others, and resolves to correct or improve some aspect of his life and social dealings.
Compassion, connection and correction.
Instead of seeing the defect in others, one ought to have compassion for others, praying on how to connect with the person more than the defect and with fraternal charity, address what needs be corrected in view of the other’s improvement.
In family life, the attitude of constant communication and bonding is enriching for all its members. All that one has to do, as Pope Francis suggested, is making the small effort to often say, “Thank you,” “Please,” “I’m sorry…,” “Can I help you?” and many other gestures of human affection and service.
When we strive to live these few points on interior googling, we will become constant witnesses of God’s mercy in this grace-filled Year of Mercy. This is everyone’s mission as Pope Francis writes:
“(…) without a witness to mercy, life becomes fruitless and sterile, as if sequestered in a barren desert. The time has come for the Church to take up the joyful call to mercy once more. It is time to return to the basics and to bear the weaknesses and struggles of our brothers and sisters” (Misericordiæ vultus, no. 10).
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