NADINE Lustre has written an emotional and heartwarming message for her late brother Isaiah Lustre.
The actress-singer took to Instagram on Friday, posting three photos of her brother while at the beach and a short video of him enjoying the water.
He would have turned 17 yesterday. In her Instagram post, Lustre mentioned Isaiah’s blog, which details his depression and the heartbreak he went through, among others.
“I’m so proud of you. Never knew you had such talent with words. I’m happy to have read all of your entries and discover that you have such a beautiful mind. Excited to read your scripts/stories soon. https://medium.com/isaiahlustre/latest,” she said.
Lustre then thanked her brother for “teaching everyone a very important lesson.”
“Thank you for opening my eyes and making me braver. I know now that whatever challenge I will have to face, I will be able to pull through because of you,” the Kapamilya actress added. Isaiah died early this week reportedly due to suicide inside their house in Quezon City.
Lustre continued her message by saying that she will miss Isaiah’s face and corny jokes.
“I wish you stayed with us longer. I am keeping my promise and we will still travel the world together. No more crying. Happy Birthday, Dude. Joyeux voyage, je t’aime frère,” she ended the post.
Isaiah started his blog (https://medium.com/@isaiahlustre) in July 2016.
On June 27, 2016, he wrote a blog titled, “What it takes to be Depressed.” It had 50 reactions.
Part of his blog reads, “All you need is a person with positive thinkin, does not matter if he or she experienced emotional trauma in the past, on the contrary its better, sprinkle a little bit doubt in there, a dash of fear, finely minced hopelessness and stir constantly, of course we can’t forget a few drops of low self esteem, you can add some shame if you like, of course don’t forget the regrets! A little anxiety and confusion to taste, serve with a plate of mistrust and voila! Squeeze a bit of despair and voila! You got yourself a breaking, crying person within minutes!”
Another blog he wrote titled, “Perks of being alone” was posted August 20, 2016.
His blog reads, “Well for starters, double the productivity, this is what ive noticed for the past months, ive never been more productive, compared to the previous years, its going good, second, theres nothing to stop you from doing a certain thing, if anything it pushes you even more to do it, think of it, no distractions all the me time i need, sadly too much me time gets a little uncomfortable, theres that longing feeling, but heck, id gladly exchange it for double the productivity, its always a pain everyday, but i just gotta bear it for now.”
Isaiah then wrote another blog which talks about “Hopeless Romantic” published last May 29 this year.
“I strongly believe that im the kind of person that cant live alone in this world, always missing a piece, empty inside, of course the love for family and friends are different, but to love a special someone is different. I’ve always been alone when I was little, around grade school I only had one or two friends, but even they didn’t stick around for a while, as I moved on to intermediate level, it’s a whole other story, everyone was grouped, you either belonged to one or none at all, and I didn’t belong anywhere,” he wrote.
Isaiah also talked about “Post Death,” a blog entry he published last June 26.
“Ive tried to kill myself, once, with a shard of glass in hand I tried to cut deep on my arms but to no avail, now that I look back to it now, what difference would it make? Absolutely nothing. When you die in this world people may hold a funeral for you, maybe a few people will cry, and leave some sad for days, weeks, months, years, then what?,” he said.
“They all move on with their lives, why? Because there is no use in being sad, there is no use crying for something that is already gone, because it wont change a god damn thing. People have bigger problems than me, some have none to eat, some have no roof to sleep under, some might be lying on their deathbed as we speak, I wish I could make a difference for those people, I wish when I die, I could somehow magically fix their problems, and maybe some of mine as well, but life doesnt work that way,” his blog ended.
He also had an entry titled, “Im not special” published last July 3.
“A part of me keeps holding on just to see if theres still hope, this is stupid, im stupid. Everybody really does leave you eventually. Fucking hell, it lasted a month,” he said as part of his published blog. Isaiah also talked about break-up in his blog post titled, “How does love work?” published last July 28.
“This break up thing is harder than I thought, it feels as if it gets harder everyday, everynight, I remember more and more about us, I keep coming back to the days everything was alright, ive been so careful since, ive tried being a good person, a better person, I went to the gym just to distract myself, now it doesnt work anymore, whenever it rains, I feel the sting on my wounds as I watch the cars go by whenever I go home, they always say when you do good, itll come back to you, ive tried to do good, ive tried to keep myself from hurting anyone, ive just now realized its so hard to be nice to others when you yourself is suffering, all you can think of is trying to get through the day without breaking down, without trying to bury yourself under all the wrong you did, without crying, day and night I still cry. This love is pain, we both know that, we both know that its forced, Im tired, youre tired, how do we make this work?”